I have something really important to say that has been eating me up inside for weeks. If I don’t share it with the world soon, I just might explode like the three Easter Peep’s I “accidently” left in the microwave.
I have a weakness for Chinese buffets.
Insert heavy gasping and moaning here.
Don’t ask me why. I can’t really explain it. Perhaps it’s the sweetness of my server as she refers to me by my beverage choice in her broken English. Or maybe it’s the tingly feeling I get when I dive my chopsticks deep into the goopy mounds of things that taste like chicken.
Several weeks ago I decided to recreate the same joyful sensations at home as I feel at my local, tacky decorated, Chinese restaurant. Crab Rangoon are one of my favorites. So why not attempt to make them on my own?
They were a total FAILURE!
I learned several very valuable lessons that faithful evening. So sit back and enjoy my four “F’s” of failure. In the mean time, I’m going to leave the Crab Rangoon making to the experts.
Folding: The original recipe called for folding the wontons in the shape of a triangle. Since I’m not one to follow the status quo, I opted for a more complicated corner to corner pattern. My lesson here was the process of aligning all four corners together was so time consuming, I got bored after the first five. Keep it simple and fold it into a triangle pocket.
Frying: This recipe reminded me of why I don’t deep fry very much. I hate how my kitchen seems to smell like the back of a fast food restaurant every time I pour even the tiniest amount of oil in a pan. Mainly, my oil was way too hot for frying the delicate packets. The first few looked more like blackened golf balls than what they should really look like. Invest in a really good thermometer.
Filling: The filling was completely flavorless. I even tried to kick the spice up by adding a half a teaspoon of red pepper flakes. I don’t think it was the fault of the original recipe author. The problem most likely was the cheap imitation crab I found on sale. Even though times are tough, real crab would have made a world of difference.
Freezing: Ever make something that you really didn’t like and store it in the freezer to not waste food? Only to leave it there until it becomes so freezer burned it’s completely unrecognizable? Well, I decided to only cook half of the recipe and store the remaining in the freezer. Every time I opened the door to reach for the ice cream, there they were reminding of my failures. Save yourself the trouble. If you didn’t like it the first time, what makes you think you’re going to like it later?
Authors Note: Sure the photo may look pretty. But don’t be fooled, they aren’t as easy as they look.